Random Blog Stuff
Fri, 11th July
I ended up staying up until around 4am.. I was honestly afraid of going to sleep because of a couple of things. One was because at 3am someone decided it was a good idea to ring our doorbell? It was totally random and uncalled for. I was going to sleep at around 3am but after the doorbell was wrung I just stayed up. And it wasn’t just our oddly strange house being weird. I know it was an actual person because I could hear footsteps outside, even if only a few. And ontop of that, I heard a car door shut around 5-10 seconds later, and a car drove off. Like ????
My Morning Revelation
I was going to have a normal day today, nothing big or special, no blog, etc. But I thought about my blog carefully. More than just my blog, I thought about people and what they have going on in their own lives. Since a year ago (to this day lol), I tried doing a bunch of big things and preparing a bunch of stuff to make me look super awesome and cool in an attempt to impress someone. But I realised this morning that normal people usually just do small things throughout the day. Not everything needs to be super big to be memorable.
A story that happened last year
Due to that reasoning, I started thinking about last year and what small things I did to feel better. Last year in November I’d had a fight with a dear friend, purely because I was being careless about what I was saying, and made a couple of mistakes which made this person very upset with me. I felt stress, sadness, and guilt from what I’d said (I still feel guilt about it even now). So I went out for a walk a day or two after our fight. It was pouring down with rain on this day, but I felt something from inside of me push to take a walk. I was sad at first, but as I walked I could see more of the world around me. How beautiful and how lush it was. I’d forgotten one of the most beautiful aspects of life, which is the simple things like taking a walk outside. The further I walked, the more my spirits felt lifted. I ended up stopping at a gorgeous tree for some time to appreciate the lush scenery before me. I cant even explain it properly with the photos I took because it was different from when I decided to take the photos.
What the tree was like
When I was walking up to the tree, it stopped raining for a second and the wind blew a bit more for around a minute. After that minute of wind, it stopped completely. I couldn’t feel much of a breeze. The sun was poking slightly through one of the rainclouds. Not enough to be blinding, but enough that you could see it. Purple petals were falling from the tree, bees were buzzing around the flowers and petals that were all around this tree, and the air smelt like honey. Lorikeets came to sit on the branches of this tree, I could see ants crawling at the base of the tree, and some caterpillars crawling up the base of the tree trunk. It didn’t even feel real. No people were around, it was quiet, no noise or anything. I could hear the chirps of the birds and the buzzing of the bees as they flew all around me. I put some music on and sat at a bench located under the tree. It was so beautiful. The feeling of being around so many animals just made me feel better.
Continuation...
You see, I’m not a big “people” person. I don’t really have a lot of friends. I enjoy my time when it’s spent around animals a lot more than when it’s spent around people. My reasoning behind this is simple. Animals don’t make much noise (when they’re chill with you). They’re more genuine creatures than people are now; no hidden agendas, not much problems. All you need to do is understand them correctly and you’ll do fine. With that being said, I will continue. After hanging around the tree for a little too much, I went back home and grabbed some bread. I ran back to the tree just in-time to find the rainbow Lorikeets still sitting up in the tree. I fed them bread, with some of them flying near me to get some bread. It was beautiful. Once I was completely out of bread, I begun walking home. The sun was setting, and the walk-back home was peaceful. I walked until I reached a tree that looked EXTREMELY green. Like a highlighter looking green, so I took some photos of that, I think some of the birds might’ve followed me for some more bread lol. While I was walking I petted someone’s friendly dog. The little guy was adorable, and he was super excited to see me too (I was a stranger to him but he loved seeing me anyway <3). I gave him a bellyrub before continuing my walk home. Walking down, I saw a stray cat sitting in some grass. I walked up to her, she was chilling. Gave her a pat on the head and a scratch behind the ears. She nuzzled her face into the side of my hip which was adorable. Then I continued walking home. When I finally got home, I was greeted with a familiar face. It was Knuckles the Echidna (you can read a bit about him in my first ever blog). Knuckles was walking across the road again so I just stood close to him so that no cars would run him over. I LOVE YOU KNUCKLES <3333
Thoughts about the entire thing
I loved that day outside. It calmed me down so much, and gave me a new appreciation for life as I look back at it in my times of deep struggle. But it also made me take a look at how beautiful the world is around us. Nature is so beautiful. The way the wind blows against your face, how water falls from the sky, how the piercing sun can warm you when it’s cold. It’s all beautiful. I went scrolling further up to before I was even having these internal and emotional problems. Back to when all I was focused on was building my business. I took some lovely photos back then. The sky would light up orange and pink in the evening when the sun was setting. Tbh, it looks pretty cool. Sometimes I can’t really help but feel some certain ways about how life is for me now and what’s going on. I’d love nothing more to have transparent thinking and to not really care about stuff. It’s a great strength and weakness of my own. I care too much about everyone and everything. I need to teach myself how to let go of everything I would fear to lose. (Like what Yoda says in Revenge Of The Sith).
The End
Not sure on what else to write here. Better to just leave it off as a happy goodbye until I write again.